Where are my flip flops????

I need my flip flops! My shorts! T-shirts and tank tops! And yes - my swimsuit!

I'm going to the ocean!

HOT DAMN!

Two weeks from Sunday, September 11th we are leaving for Myrtle Beach, SC. Yeah! Whoopee! (Just be real glad you can not see me jumping up and down here..it's not a pretty sight.)

I made him sit down tonight and listen to me describe some hotels...and give me his credit card. We have a reservation!

Now, a word to all the weathermen out there - NO HURRICANES! I want sand, surf, SUN! My legs glow in the dark forgodssake! I need some color!

And sharks listen up! I will hit your damned nose so hard you will be looking out your tush if you get near me. Dolphins are safe, even ugly fish...just no fish with big sharp teeth. I am old, I am tough and I will not taste good. Trust me on this one.

Seven days...seven WHOLE days. Count em...1234567...NO WORK for over a week! The computers can fry for all I care. Virus' can invade the CEO's computer and the main server. I will not be there to fix them. (Can you tell I have not had any time off all year?) My cell phone will not be answering calls from the office, sorry. (Bless you caller ID.)

An oceanfront suite with a balcony (no, I wont toss him off...well, maybe). 5 pools (who uses a pool when they have an ocean in front of them??) a work out room (HA! excuse me while I laugh!) and even free breakfast.

I am ready. I have my towel, my sun lotion and my flip flops (they were in the bottom of the closet) and I am ready.

Cabana boy, bring me my drink!