December - my birthday - and my son :)

Sometimes I hate December.

It brings my birthday with it - and you all know what that means...getting older!

Arghhh...

But this year was different. It was good. It was wonderful actually.

I went to Michigan to visit my son. We hadn't seen each other for a few months, and its been a long long time since I've spent my birthday with him. So, when he asked me to come up I jumped at the chance.

I got there Saturday - he was at the store picking up groceries and other things, so I met him in there. Using my cell phone I located him.

He hugged me SO big, right there in front of the pharmacy :) We didn't care who was watching. It was wonderful.

We took the stuff back to his place then went to have some lunch. We talked, we laughed. That night we went out to dinner with his girlfriend. It was fun. More laughing and talking.

The next morning he ran to the store - he forgot the cinnamon rolls for breakfast (a tradition of ours). When he came back he had a huge bouquet of flowers in his hands and a card. He looked at me and asked, "You feeling lucky?" I had NO idea what this child of mine was talking about - until I opened my card.

In it was $100 and a note saying "Here's $100 to blow at the MGM Casino today!"

And we went - and I blew the $100 - but we had a blast!! Just me and my boy!!

We laughed, he taught me how to play craps, I got him to play video poker. He won $280 - I lost everything he gave me. We played slot machines, and black jack and then more slots.

On the way back to his apartment I thanked him for the best birthday I had had in years. He just smiled.

I left the next day to come back. He called me within minutes and said "Mom, we need to see each other more." I cried and so did he. I agreed, and we will see each other more often. We both need it.

It was a wonderful weekend. A visit with my son with no visits to hospitals or doctors, no illness or pain - just love and laughter.

I will never forget it.

Thank you my son. Thank you for who you are and all you do. I love you.

Still alive and kicking...or I should say "walking"...

It's been quite some time since I posted anything to my blog. I won't apologize because that would make it seem like I have this big head and think that millions of people read my blog - and they don't - but, just in case you do and you like it..well ok...I apologize for not writing anything in a while.

It's not that I've been overly busy doing all kinds of wild and wonderful things. I haven't (damnit). Just the normal 50 hour work week, laundry, cooking, cleaning, shopping with Mom and walking....

Yes, walking.

I bought a treadmill.

And I'm using it.

And I like it.

Ok, so I am nuts, but I like the damned thing. I get on there for at least 30 minutes a night at 3.5 mph and sweat my tush off (or at least I HOPE I can sweat my tush off).

I know that doesn't sound fast, but my sister is going at 2.0 mph on her's and she walks 1 mile in 30 minutes.

I can, and have, and do almost nightly, walk 1 mile in 17 minutes flat.

The roomie says I trot, not walk. (Hmmmm...I trot, I sweat...does that make me hot to trot???)

I am not doing this to fight getting old, cause that is going to happen whether I like it or not. But I am doing it to maybe help tighten up a little, and maybe help with the ole stiff leg and achy bones thing. And...it is good for me mentally. I concentrate on what I am doing and escape the world, or just walk fast and watch tv.

But I have learned one thing.

Do not try to walk at 3.5 - 3.7 mph while watching Planets Funniest Animals. You can mistep on your treadmill and go flying off the back into the wall.

Trust me on that one.

Anyway, I'll try to be around more. Hope you will be too.

Orlando? San Diego? Vegas? What to do..what to do..

The roomie has decided he wants to go on vacation - again.

Ok fine. I figure this will be my last one for a long long time, and I'm always up for a vacation trip. I'm a Sagittarius after all :)

But now to decide where to go...hmmmmm...

Orlando with a side trip to the ocean. I could handle that. Sand, surf, sunshine...Possibly a cabana boy or two (or three, but hey I'm not gonna be picky - not when it comes to cabana boys). We could see the Mouse. Went there once - our very first trip together ever. December 1998. We had gone to Pleasure Isle the night before and well, let's just say the roomie consumed too many draft beers (I almost had to get a luggage cart to use to get him up to the room) - so needless to say he wasn't in the mood to ride any rides the next day. He did take me to see the Mouse though and I would love to go again.

Or there is San Diego. Hmmm....Sand, surf, sunshine. And yep, you got it - cabana boys (well, maybe. I never saw any last time we were there). We went there a couple of years ago for two whole days as part of a side trip to Phoenix. His brother and wife went with us and well, lets just say we didn't get to see a whole heck of a lot. I got whiplash while driving down Hollywood Blvd. (ok, so we took a side trip on the side trip - to LA). The roomies brother yelled - There's Graumans Chinese Theatre!

ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!

Damn...missed it...

Oh, I got a picture of the Beverly Hills sign. By hanging out the car window while stopped at a traffic light.

Did make it to the zoo. Great place! Had a lot of fun there and even got to see a baby panda. Took lots and lots of pics.

Best part of that side trip was La Jolla. The ocean was just absolutely gorgeous there. I could have sat there for days.

So yes, San Diego - California in general - is a definite option.

Or, we could do....

VEGAS BABY!

We went there almost two years ago. My first and only time. Had a great time there. Didn't win anything. Went with $500 to blow and came back with $115 (won it back on the last day!). So many things we didn't get to see there - wanted to go to the old section of town, etc. So - we have talked of doing that, maybe even seeing a show or two. Just walking the Strip and people watching is a trip.

We saw Santa there last time. Sitting outside M & M World reading the paper, wearing a straw hat and a brightly flowered shirt. I think he was having a little fun before the big night just two weeks later. I just walked by and told him "I'm being a good girl Santa." His comment? "I bet you are...I bet you are."

Hmmmm...didn't get much for Christmas that year....

So, IF we really do take a trip in November, we have some decisions to make.

What to do...what to do....

Wherever we go I'm sure it will be great. And I will cherish it forever, for it may be my last trip with the roomie.

We'll see what happens.

(But - if we go to Vegas I won't be able to tell you. Ya know...what happens in Vegas...

Getting older....

I think I am going through a mid-life crisis.

Whatever in the hell that means.

My father used to say "A 50something year old person can't be going through a mid-life crisis - because how many people actually live to be over 100 years old??

I feel like a teenager who is hitting that time in their life when they are trying to decide what they want to do for the rest of their life.

Confusion! Changes in appearance! Hormones running rampant!!

Good Lord! Do we actually revert to our teenage years?? Acck!

(Well, that could account for the acne I get on occasion.)

No, I don't want to run out and have affairs and act like I am 20something again. Nothing worse than a 50 year old woman dressing like a teenage girl and trying to act like one.

But, I am trying to figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life.

My job is ok. I do get some "validation" at times. Someone will thank me for helping them out of a jam, or I get government officials involved in a case to stop a bad person from taking advantage of someone else. Those validations mean a lot.

But in my personal life? Well, it's non-existent (with the exception of my child and Mom - they love me unconditionally thank God).

And now I think it's time I moved on to the next phase of my life.

A life without the roomie.

It's something I've been thinking about for a long time. It's not been an easy decision - I've been with this man for almost 8 years. But, I truly believe in my heart it's something I must do.

It's scary, yet exciting. I've lived on my own most of my life, so I know what to expect. Yes, it might be lonely at times - but I truly think being with someone and being lonely is far worse that being alone.

And, even though I am now a "mature" woman (hey...I'm not old yet!) there are many things I want to do and try. Things that I can not do here - I'm not allowed. (I won't go into detail, no point.)

Someday I may end up back in Michigan. My child wants me there. Not now though, I can't leave Mom. But someday I will be close to him again.

I want to wake up and smile at the sun shining in the window. I want to scrub floors that are mine, because I want to. If I don't want to cook and want to stop and pick up tacos on the way home....Well okay! I want to be able to spend time with people that mean a lot to me and not feel guilty for doing so.

I want to look in a mirror and like "me" again.

It's time for a change.

Mid-life crisis? Not sure, maybe...could be.

Nope...It's time for Sandy to have a life.

A heartfelt thank you...

To all who read my previous post and left such wonderful comments - I thank you.

Life tosses us some hardballs at times, we get through them - but kind words help. And they are much appreciated.

A Night I'll Never Forget...

Four years ago tonight something happened that changed my son's life forever.

The night started out innocently enough - a picnic at his cousin Michaels with all the cousins and their children. Food, fun, laughter...and fireworks.

Late in the evening Michael and Chris were setting off fireworks for the family (who was standing across the yard). It was time for the last firework of the night - a 4" mortar. Michael lit it and the two of them ran back to the others - but heard an odd noise...

My son remembers nothing after that.

According to Michael and the others, he and my son turned around to see what was happening - the firework was defective and was exploding out instead of up. Michael told me that he and Chris jumped in front of the children to protect them.

And they took the hit.

My son, Chris, was hit with a cinder block in the face and thrown approximately 15 feet into the air. Michael was injured too. The cousins attended to Michael immediately as he was bleeding horribly.

They thought my boy was dead.

Approximately 10 minutes later they said there was a scream from the bowels of Hell - it was coming from my son. Kathy (another cousin) ran to him and cradled him with towels and blankets until the rescue squad got there.

The blast took out a large section of wood privacy fence. It shattered all the windows in a nearby van and left large gaping holes in the side of Michaels garage. They found cinder block three blocks away from Michaels house. I was told it looked like a war zone.

Both boys were rushed to the University of Michigan Hospital in Ann Arbor. They were placed in the trauma/burn unit.

My ex called me about 5:30 the next morning to tell me Chris had been in an accident. I immediately thought "car"...and then he gave me the news. He told me that the dimple on my son's chin was gone.

I threw things into a bag immediately and got ready to leave. Before I did I called the hospital. I had to talk to someone that had seen my child and could tell me what was going on. The nurse handed the phone to my child..."Mom, don't go getting upset like you always do!" I heard. It was like a voice from heaven. He told me he loved me and I said the same. We hung up and I was out the door.

I arrived at the hospital before 9am. My son was in surgery. I sat there in this huge waiting room alone. Complete silence surrounding me. I had no idea what was going on with my child. His father had gone home to bed.

A few hours later a doctor appeared. He told me they were working on my son's arm and showed me xrays. They had already worked on his face. He had 17 facial fractures. His lower jaw was shattered inside and they had to put in two titanium plates to hold it together. The nerves in the lower right part of his face were destroyed. His eye was ok even though the bone around it was broken. They stitched up the cuts too. His arm was another matter. When they opened it up the bones just fell out in pieces...lots of little pieces.

My son was put into a chemically induced coma for five days. I sat by his bedside from 6am til 11pm when they ran me out. I slept in the waiting room - when I did sleep.

The next day they did more surgery on his arm, to clean out the wound more. He still had more shrapnel in there to get out.

A few days later, and a couple of surgeries later, they took Chris off the vent and woke him up. He was so confused, was having severe hallucinations from the moriphine. He thought he had been hit by a car. I told him over and over and over what happened, but he couldnt remember from one minute to the next. He got very combative at times. At 11:30 that night I headed to a hotel to get some sleep, only to be back to the hospital less than an hour later. They needed to take blood for the surgery the next day and I was needed to calm him down, and I did. I stood by his bedside (which was a miracle they let me...no one stays in rooms all night with patients in the trauma icu) but when I had to leave for a bit early in the morning for the doctors to come in, he jumped up and yanked out his two tubes he still had in him - one for feeding, one for drainage. So, again I was back in there to calm him until they took him down for more surgery on the arm, this time a skin graft. He slept most of that day, and that evening his girlfriend and father said they would stay with him for a while so I could go get some sleep. I went back to the hotel and fell asleep and was back there the next morning about 6:30am. They had moved him over night into a "step down" room. When I walked in he said "Mom! I've been telling them to call you!" (He had no idea I had been there the whole time.) "Mom, take me home. I just wanna lay on the bed, drink pop and eat potato chips with you and watch TV". He wasnt happy when I told him I couldnt take him home yet. I was thrilled that he was alert and talking!"

We sat and talked a lot on that Friday, trying to get him to understand what happened. His cousin Michael came in to visit often (He had basically the same type injury to his right arm as Chris - and his left wrist was broken and his thumb was almost totally severed from his hand - but was reconnected successfully.) The next night I stayed with him in his room - he was so ill from all the moriphine, and just the trauma...and he had a nurse from hell that night and afternoon that would NOT do anything for him - so I did. I got no sleep that night, but I was where I needed to be.

That Saturday was better. Except we had a hell of a time with him and the feeding tube. The nurse had turned it on when he was sleeping (you do not do that when a patient is laying down)...so he was very ill when he woke up. We actually got him out of bed in the morning and walked him down the hall a little ways - and we stopped, and he looked in the mirror - he finally wanted to see. I held him as he cried.

There have been 18 surgeries since that day in 2002. It's not been an easy trip for my child but he has survived in more ways than one. He still has his arm, and it works! He is whole and well.

And I still have my boy to hug - complete with the dimple in his chin :)

Price gouging?? Not the oil companies

Cough cough...gasp...wheeze.

The Department of Energy has reports available on their website...from 2003.

Hmmm...last I knew, it was 2006.

I know, I know...this is an old subject. However - our gas in Dayton, Ohio was $2.58/gallon for regular - this morning - June 12, 2006. Tonight? $2.95. Our prices go up and down from day to day here.

I went to Michigan this past weekend to see my son. He had told me that prices were a little higher there than here. Actually there was just a few cents difference in price. He has also told me that the prices there do not fluctuate like they do here. They just go up and stay there.

And, our Department of Energy is already warning that prices will continue to go up...it's hurricane season after all.

Give me a freaking break...

Conoco says they only make about 10 cents per gallon profit (coughcough)...The Washington Post in September 2005 stated the refineries were making 99 cents per gallon in profit! And, according to USA Today, Exxon Mobile grossed $21 BILLION in 2003, $25.3 BILLION in 2004 and a whopping $36.1 BILLION in 2005.

Price gouging? Oh no, couldn't be.

Could it?

A Little Greek Woman...my Mom

This picture was taken February 16, 1944. My Mom was 20 years old. My brother was 7 months.

My Mom and Dad met in March 1941. They married that July. He wanted a family and so did she. And a family they had.

Seven of us.

Their first daughter passed on the day she was born. Spina Bifida was not treatable back then. Mom held her baby as she died. My brother was born in '43, a sister in '46, two more boys in '50 and '53, me in '54 and my younger sister in '61.

My brother, Charles, passed in 1957. He was barely 13. Leukemia.

Mom had a rough childhood. She had a father who loved her dearly. He came to this country at the age of 18 and spoke no english. He learned it quickly, started a business, married and had two children. My grandmother left my mom and her brother when mom was 3 years old. Her father did his best as a single parent, but for a time Mom and my uncle stayed at a childrens home during the week and with her father on weekends.

It was hell, but I truly believe it is what made her such a wonderful Mother.

And she is. Truly.

Mom is now almost 83. She has had 4 strokes, uses wheels to get around (and we do get around!), lost her husband of 48 years in 1989, survived breast cancer surgery last year, has lost 2 children and 2 grand children - yet, this woman, this tower of strength has such a fantastic outlook on life. She always has a smile and a laugh when you need it.

We have so much fun together, even now. She loves to shop and has a watch fetish. One of every color and style I do believe. She loves anything to do with Native Americans (her Mother was part Cherokee). She likes to read, sew...and play computer games.

And she wants to live to be 100.

I think she'll make it. I hope she does. I can't imagine my life without her.

She has given me strength, laughter, hugs....love. She gives love so freely. No one is a stranger. Her children, grandchildren, great grandchildren and even great great grandchild love her dearly.

We will all carry that love with us, long after she is gone. I will carry it with me always.

To my Mother, my best friend - I love you and thank you for all you are, have been, and will be.

Thursday....my night off

It's Thursday!

Yeah! Hot Damn! Whoopee!

Ok, ok....so I get a little carried away sometimes.

Actually, it's not so different than any other day - except...

The roomie plays golf on Thursday evenings, and his son usually disappears to a friends house.

I am ALONE! (Insert another whoopee and hot damn here!)

No fixing two dinners (his son won't normally eat what I fix for us...grrr), no laundry (I have clean clothes for tomorrow....you?), no dishes (two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce...well - you know the rest), no sweeping, dusting or cleaning that dreaded toilet (the hazmat gear is tucked away for the night).

I can actually sit and relax (until about 8:30) and surf blogs, or post on a forum or two, play some games, catch up on emails, talk to my son on the phone without getting dirty looks....

Heaven....I'm in heaven (I will not do a podcast and make you listen to my singing.) (You're welcome.)

I have been doing something for myself lately - and the roomie hates it because I get here later in the evening....I've been tanning. Yep, evil UV rays are penetrating my body and turning me brown. And I LOVE it! I can lay under those lights with stereo headphones on and just drift away from everything and everyone for 15-20 minutes of pure bliss.

And why do I not have tan lines?

Cause I tan nekkid. (Spelled that way on purpose, no checks please!)

The roomie about...well...crapped when I told him. He honestly thought I took a swim suit and put it on. I don't think so! I explained to him that I am in a little room by myself, door is locked - and if anyone wants to peek and see my ugly nekkid ole body - go for it. Their problem, not mine :)

So...I've had some time to myself lately. I like it. I've missed it.

Changes they are acoming :)

If looks could kill.....

I would be dead...and probably burning in hell right now.

And it all started with a trip to Walmart.

Geesh.

I noticed Saturday while rolling Mom's chair around to get her in the Jeep that, once again, I have a nail in one of my rear tires.

Arrrghhhh

I have no idea when I did it, and it seems to be holding air ok, so I took her home and decided I would get it fixed later. So yesterday I started calling around and realized not too many places are open on Sundays that do that kind of thing (duh me). Then it hit me - Walmart sells tires, wonder if they fix them? I called. "Yes we do", he said "bring it on over!" So I did, as I was on my way to my sisters to visit my brother who is in from Wisconsin. Figured I'd stop, get it done and not have to take any time off work this week.

Little did I know that a saintly little old woman would be working the counter. She seemed nice enough until....she asked my phone number.

I gave it to her after giving her my name. She looked at her little machine and then at me. "Oh, does it have another name coming up?" I asked. "Yes, it does" she stated very curtly. "Does it say (roomies name inserted here)?"....."Yes it does" she stated even MORE curtly. "Oh, I live with him" I said innocently.

FLAMES FROM HELL shot out of that womans eyes! I could feel the heat all the way to my toes!

"You what?" she asked.

"I live with him. And yes, we used to have sex, but not for about three years now. So, I figure I am revirginated and am no longer living in sin."

I thought she was gonna die right there on the spot.

So, with flaming eyes bearing down on me she continued to take my information....55,000 miles, Jeep Liberty, Dark Blue, 2002.

Then, she tells me there are 6 people ahead of me.

Do what? 6?? "And how long will that take?" I asked.

"Well, one needs 4 tires - thats about an hour. The next wants 2, thats about another 1/2 hour......."

"Excuse me, but just give me back my key. I'll have to do this later."

"But I've entered all your information!!" she exclaimed (rather loudly I might add).

"Well, you will just have to take it all back out. I can't wait that long."

"So you have more important things to do?" she asked.

By now I had just about had it with the hell fires burning from her eyes...

"Yes ma'am I do. I have a date with my new boyfriend and we have to meet in an hour because the man I live with will be calling me later and I want to get some hot steaming sweaty animal like sex in before he calls."

She handed me my keys. I walked out smiling.

Now...if only I had that boyfriend. Damn.

Happy Birthday Christopher!!!

Twenty-four years ago today the most wonderful thing happened to me...

I gave birth to my son.

He is the light of my life.

We are not just Mom and Son - we are friends.

And I love him more than life itself.

So if you see this guy running around Michigan today, wish him a Happy Birthday :)

I do not have blue hair....

I am blonde.

Ok, ok....I was naturally blonde as a child. Then it turned crappyoldbrowndishwater color.

Now...I am blonde. My hair is not blue.

Yet, when in Michigan this past weekend I started to feel like a little old woman with blue hair driving on the interstate and I was driving my Jeep about 75 mph (the speed limit is 70...Ok, so I was speeding...tell that to the cars that passed me at about 90 mph - including two Michigan State Police cars with NO lights flashing...).

No, I don't drive mega fast. I want to get there alive thankyouverymuch. And, I don't drive in the left lane unless I am passing someone. But I feel like some little old fart out for a Sunday drive when I am in that state.

I have friends who live in Michigan that hate, absolutely HATE to drive through Ohio (that's where I live...see...it says so over ---->). Yes, we have lots and lots of state cops sitting and hiding all over the place. (I counted 10 between Dayton and the Michigan border this past Friday night...150 miles according to Google Maps). So, with that many cops hanging around on the interstate you learn to drive the speed limit (and you also learn where all the highway patrol posts are, but that's a whole other story).

My son says I need to learn to drive like Michiganders (is that a word?) do. I lived there once....long long ago, in a galaxy far far...wait...wrong story....long ago. Didn't drive that way then, don't drive like that now. And, I can imagine that people from Michigan hate the way us Ohioans drive.

That's why I let my son drive all weekend :)

Logging in for love???

And what is so new about that??

I'm not sure if you've seen it, but TLC has a new show about people looking for love online. It's about 11 women and their search...

Ok, this isn't new. Trust me. It's how I met the roomie 7-1/2 yrs. ago.

Actually, I met a lot of guys from online. My friend and I sat on the phone one night while we wrote our personals. We had one hell of a good time laughing and writing.

And I had 40something responses within two days. I was shocked to say the least. And I had fun.

Ohhhh some of the emails I received were an experience. Married men looking for fun (but..but...we don't sleep together anymore!), single men with teenagers who needed someone to pick up after them (yellow pages guy...under Molly Maids)...and then there were the ones with no pictures (which is fine) and would describe themselves....

ahem....

One such experience...I was chatting with this guy online from Columbus (about 60 miles east of here), he was going to be coming through town so we decided to have dinner. I talked to him on the phone, and he seemed nice enough... He tells me he is 5'10" (I'm 5'7"), brown hair, glasses.

That night, up pulls a MINI VAN (bad sign #1) (ok, I think...he's married). I hear a knock on the door. I open it and I KNOW he has to notice the look on my face (terror?)...

He is maybe 5'4" tall...Hair? WHERE???????? ohwait, there's one there, oh, and one over there, oh and a few long ones combed over there (and I do mean FEW). Brown? Maybe a long time ago they were... Oh, and I wont talk about the big hair growing on the top of his nose...

Ok, so I was a nice person and didn't come up with an excuse not to go. We went to a small steak house about 10 miles from the house. (Did I mention he didn't smoke (I do - he knew this) and his mini van smelled like vicks vaporub? My sinus' were clear all night.) I agreed to sit in the nonsmoking section, ordered a cheap steak (as he was counting his money when we sat down and had not even ordered yet.) No desert, no sour cream on the potato....the salad came with the meal.

We sat there in silence most of the time. I couldn't say anything. Honestly I was afraid I would run screaming from the restaurant or die laughing. I wasn't sure which. Oh, he was saying all kinds of nice things to me, I looked nice, etc. He wanted to go someplace after - I said no, it was a school night and had to get home to my son.

He took me home and thankgod in my driveway was my son, his best friend Adam and a few other friends were washing Adams jeep in my driveway (they had been out playing in the corn fields around the house.) I got out of the van quickly (I didn't want to have to even hug this man let alone kiss him goodnite.) I looked at my son, who was ready to laugh his ass off and mouthed "save me"...he grinned real big and said "Mom, I need to talk to you real bad, I think we got in trouble tonight".

With that, a look of horror came across the guys face and he said his goodbye and so did I. He got in his van and left fast.

I stood there and hugged the hell out of my son and Adam who had a great laugh at me.

My son still teases me about that guy.

So TLC...I could write you stories. Trust me on that one.

You are installing what????

Banging...crashing....hammering...

What the hell is he doing now?

I had to investigate.

There he was, the roomie, installing a burglar alarm system (its what he does for a living).

In this house?

The house with walls literally falling apart? The house where the door is never locked?

The house that any burglar with half a mind would run screaming from after he broke in? (laughing or crying...not sure which they would be doing)

Ok, so no one will be able to steal my computer. That's great. Thank you roomie.

But...I kinda sorta wish someone would steal the living room set. It's beige, green and maroon forgodssake. Yes, before anyone comments, he paid for it - not me. So, according to a past commenter I shouldn't say anything. But I live here too. And it's ugly, it's just plain ugly.

Maybe, just maybe, we can go out one night and forget to turn the alarm on. We can call the police when we get back and say someone broke in...

Ohgod! They ripped the tiles off the bathroom wall!! Ohlord! They halfway installed drywall on the ceiling in the kitchen! Ohno! They ripped the framing off around the back door! And they peeled the floor tile up in the corner of the kitchen! (Damn! They left the red, white and blue shag carpet in the bathroom!!)

So, if you are ever driving down a road and see a flashing arrow - big red arrow - pointing toward a house with a sign on the porch saying "OPEN" - please come in. Come in and take the damned sofa and love seat. It's yours.

Please...

Big Time Wrestling!

Last night during an after dinner conversation with friends, someone brought up wrestling.

ohgoodgod...

Let me take you back in time...back - back - no, a little further. Back to the early 70's...Dayton, OH...Hara Arena.

Big Time Wrestling.

My Mom is a small Greek woman. At the time she was about as round as she was tall. A wonderful mother and wife.

And she loved - no - loves wrestling. In all it's glory.

She had reserved front row seats every two weeks.

The ones in the front row where the wrestlers came out to get in the ring. Those. In front of God and everyone.

And I had to take her.

She would cheer, the wrestlers would get her riled up so that she would then get the crowd all riled up. She would curse like a sailor (and you wondered where I got it...ha!).

One time, as Ben Justice was being carried out on a stretcher, this little 5'3" woman jumps up - dumps him off the stretcher onto the floor! He turns over, looks at her and smiles - and ran back to the freaking ring! The crowd went nuts! The producers were going beserk!

And she stood there smiling from ear to ear!

She actually had people ask her for her autograph. The wrestlers would come out and talk to her (us) when it was over.

And security walked us to our car.

It's not the same these days. Wrestling just isn't the same. But she would still love to go.

I just wonder who she would dump off a stretcher these days.

Ya gotta love her.

Mad Dog! Mad Dog!!

Every once in a while a woman needs a man - not the man she is in a relationship with - to show some interest. Maybe even flirt a little. Just to let her know that she is still...well...not necessarily attractive, but...wanted?

Lately there has been a man who works in my office building who talks, smiles, opens my door...and he is cute as hell. I know he does this to other ladies also, so I don't and won't let it go to my head...but it makes me feel good.

And I've been receiving emails from a man I do not know. He wants to talk he says. I know nothing about him other than he is a mad dog (his words, not mine). I guess he read my profile and saw my little picture. I have no clue.

But, it makes me feel good. It makes me feel like a woman - again.

I guess I had started to lose that part of me. Someone who walks with her head held high, a little sway in my walk. Someone who can laugh again.

I don't want to lose that part of me. I want to laugh, cry, share, hold.

It's amazing what a smile and a kind word can do.

The weekend ends...

Darn it.

Yes, I said it. Darn it all to heck anyway...

(Can you tell that the weekend has been anything but exciting?)

I did get a hair cut, long overdue. Trish does such a great job! I have this kinkycurlywavyfrizzy hair and she just does miracles with it. And, she has taught me how to do it too :)

On the way to the salon I did encounter a woman driving her car while on a cell phone....on the wrong side of the road. Now wouldn't you think having THREE lanes of traffic coming AT you that you would realize you were on the wrong side - kinda sorta going the wrong way?? ohhellno, she just kept on driving - and talking. What was really funny was the looks she gave me and the other drivers who stopped so she wouldn't hit us or others head on...

Today I went to see Mom. I love that woman. On the way back I stopped to pick up a few items at WalMart. One being a nose hair trimmer for the roomie. He can't use those little scissors I guess. Now, I'm probably wrong, but wouldn't it hurt if that little spinning thing gets caught and tangled on your nose hair? ohwell....he paid for it :)

Tonight while surfing blogs I found some interesting sites...good artists, bad artists - politics, religion, sex stories (ohmy), photographs and ponzi schemes.

Uh...wait...back up there...

Ponzi schemes?

Yep, you know - pyramid schemes. Make a ton of money by recruiting others - no product - fake work at home stuff. I actually found a blog telling how you can make thousands sitting at home blahblahblah...

The FTC describes it this way: "Ponzi" SchemesPonzi schemes are a type of illegal pyramid scheme named for Charles Ponzi, who duped thousands of New England residents into investing in a postage stamp speculation scheme back in the 1920s. Ponzi thought he could take advantage of differences between U.S. and foreign currencies used to buy and sell international mail coupons. Ponzi told investors that he could provide a 40% return in just 90 days compared with 5% for bank savings accounts. Ponzi was deluged with funds from investors, taking in $1 million during one three-hour period—and this was 1921! Though a few early investors were paid off to make the scheme look legitimate, an investigation found that Ponzi had only purchased about $30 worth of the international mail coupons.
Decades later, the Ponzi scheme continues to work on the "rob-Peter-to-pay-Paul" principle, as money from new investors is used to pay off earlier investors until the whole scheme collapses.

Even on weekends I bring my work home....arrrgh...someday I will just stop worrying about people that get involved in such stupid schemes.

And hell will freeze over too.

Ohwell, tomorrow is Monday. And I can check this work at home (cough cough) program out at the office....and send a nice email to the AG and FTC. It's my job, and I do it well :)

I have HAPPY FEET!!!

(Insert a Happy Dance here!)

My son called today - he heard from his lawyer - he will have his insurance settlement tomorrow!

Yeahhhhhhhhhh!

What does this mean? A lot actually....a whole lot.

My son has gone through hell the last 3-1/2 yrs. Physically, mentally, emotionally and financially. Since the explosion his life has had so many ups and downs - but the light at the end of that tunnel is getting brighter. Much brighter. Now he can at least be secure financially, pay his bills and that in turn will help the emotional and mental aspects.

The money will help with the physical part too. He will now be able to have the remaining surgeries that are needed on his jaw and teeth.

For me? I am just SO thrilled to know that my son has a brighter future. He won't have to live paycheck to paycheck as I have always done. Now when he brings home his paycheck he will be able to pay his bills and not have to worry about the medical bills that have mounted the last few years.

And he won't have to "borrow" from good ole Mom anymore (very large grin inserted here). Of course, good ole Mom will always help him if he needs it.

That's what Moms do. :)

The Joy of Comments

Yes, I deleted a comment.

I am trying hard to understand why people put degrading comments on peoples blogs. Are they so miserable and unhappy with themselves that they must go around the web and put comments on posts that are nasty, rude and crude?

Who are you, Mr. Commenter, to say those things to me? Yet to build yourself up? Can you walk through a doorway with your head that big?

If you like my post - tell me. If you don't like my post - tell me that also. But don't attack ME when you don't even know who I am.

What do I look like???

I do NOT look like this. Good lord I wish I did.

So tell me why, please oh please...

Did a man think I was...well..hmmm...trying to...well...ahem...sell myself on the street today?

It's Friday forgodssake...I was wearing jeans, tennis shoes, TWO (count em!) TWO sweaters (one being a turtleneck) and a heavy coat with my hood up....It's casual Friday!

I was NOT wearing a short skirt, fmp's and fishnet stockings.

I WAS outside watching the construction guys carrying things in and out of our building while taking a smoke break (yes, I am a smoker).

And....he was on a bike!

Not a Harley type bike - but a Schwinn type bike! Two wheels and pedals!

Even if I were trying to sell myself (and I was not) A bike??? What did he want me to do ride him while he peddled?

I am good, but not THAT good!

The construction men got a good laugh.

Me? Well, lets just say I won't be standing on the street smoking anymore...

I am being bad...real bad...bitch even...

This is hysterical.

And, it reminds me of someone.

Someone I know VERY well.

And its still hysterical.

Hysterical, but sad.

ohwell... It's still funny :)

Valentines Day....bah humbug

That about sums up the day.



It started last night.

The roomie came to be and asked me to start checking on flights for US to go to Vegas in April. I did so. Found some good rates and schedules, and found some rooms at hotels that were not outrageous in price. There is a convention there that he usually goes to (one day out of the three its there).

Then he springs it on me that his ex would be out of the country at that time and his 16 yr old son would be spending the week alone.

So...like an idiot (or a Mother - you decide) I said "do you honestly think its a good idea to leave him here alone for a week?"....

He says, "Maybe not, so I'll just go out myself for a few days."

Excuse me?

I repeat....Excuse me?

So now I am supposed to babysit your 16 yr old while you go to Vegas for 3-5 days when you said that you will attend the convention for one afternoon?

I did this last year.

Not this year.

And then you give me some little stuffed green M&M toy you got at the drug store for Valentines Day.

Ohboy, I'll cherish that all my life. The thought you put into that gift. And you didn't even say thank you for the gold tie tack I bought you...yes, the diamond is real.

The only good thing about today? My boy called - his blood tests are fine!!! Now we await the results of the CT scan he had yesterday. I'll keep my fingers and toes crossed...and say an extra prayer or two.

Happy Valentines Day everyone. Hope yours was wonderful.

Maybe next year....maybe next year.

Benzene, abscesses and my son....

If you follow this blog at all, you will know that recently my son was gassed with benzene at his place of work - Zug Island (hell on earth).

At that same time he developed an abscess on his tail bone. A bad one. He has been back and forth to doctors the last few weeks for it. Antibiotics are being taken, and not doing a lot of good. He has built up an immunity to them... He saw a surgeon the other day, has to have a CAT scan done next Monday and will see the surgeon again. They will more than likely have to go in and clean it out, scrape it and make sure it hasn't gone deeper.

I know we are not supposed to question why things happen, but sometimes I just have to...I do.

In June 2002 my boy was in a major fireworks explosion. He was in a coma for 5 days. He went through 18 surgeries in two years time. He had 17 fractures in his face and almost lost his arm. He still has more surgeries to go through to try and straighten his jaw and repair his jaw teeth that were damaged.

But he made it through. It's not been easy for him (or me) but he is whole and alive.

Two years ago he wrapped his cavalier around a tree. Banged him up pretty good, but again he made it through.

The financial difficulties because of all this has been horrible for both of us. Of course I have helped him all I can - I am his Mom! And, I will continue to help him.

So, in the last few years I have almost lost him three times. He's not a cat - he does not have nine lives! (At least that is what I keep telling him!!)

Just when he starts to see a light at the end of his dark tunnel something else happens...now its the abscess.

He is scared. He is 23 and living alone in Michigan. His father seems to be more understanding with him lately (thankgod). We talk daily. I will be with him if and when he has this surgery. And I will do what I can to help him heal - both physically and mentally.

I want him to smile again. Really and truly smile and be happy. I want him to wake up each day and be thankful for his life and to enjoy getting out of bed to face another day.

I just want my son to be happy, healthy and loved.

I can help with the loved part :)

Back in Ohio....again...

Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....

I miss the beach already! The day we left Miami it was 78 degrees!

It's 25 in Ohio now!

ARRRRRGHHHHH!

It was a good trip. We had rain one day, a couple days of high winds (see the pic above!) - but it was great anyway. Laying on the beach and listening to the waves - heaven, pure heaven.

We went to the Hard Rock Casino in Hollywood twice. The first day I won $30! Thought I was hot shit :) Second day I lost $60...ohwell. Had a great time and only lost $30. The roomie? He lost $120 the first day - and then won over $300 the next!!! On a NICKEL slot machine!! luckysombitch...

One word of advice if you ever go...if you see a "Hollywood Super Mall" on the map and decide to go...don't. I think it was the most empty mall I've ever seen. And Aventura? Well, if you have lots of money - enjoy! If you are like me - have fun looking!

The last morning in Sunny Isles I got up about 6, grabbed my cup of coffee and stood on the balcony and watched the sun come up and just listened to the waves. I could stand there forever, watching the birds flying over the water - diving into the water, the sun glistening on the water...and the sound, the wonderful sound.

Good job God...good job.

Miami Beach here I come!

I won't be blogging for the next 10 days.

I am headed to Miami Beach in the morning!

Sun, surf, sand and (hopefully) cabana boys!!!!

Take care all. See you when I get back.

If I come back :)

Benzene and my son...part 2

In my previous post I wrote about the phone call from my son telling me he had been "gassed" at work.

Benzene.

The following is taken from the CDC's website:
"Breathing very high levels of benzene can result in death, while high levels can cause drowsiness, dizziness, rapid heart rate, headaches, tremors, confusion, and unconsciousness. Eating or drinking foods containing high levels of benzene can cause vomiting, irritation of the stomach, dizziness, sleepiness, convulsions, rapid heart rate, and death.

The major effect of benzene from long-term exposure is on the blood. Benzene causes harmful effects on the bone marrow and can cause a decrease in red blood cells leading to anemia. It can also cause excessive bleeding and can affect the immune system, increasing the chance for infection."

It took hours and hours of research on the internet to find anything that would tell me how long the affects of his "gassing" would last. One site - one - told me if a person is sensitive to chemicals, etc, that it could last a few days. My son is still feeling the affects.

And today he went to the ER - he had a small abcess on his lower back. In the last 2 days it has doubled in size and began extremely painful. The doctor told him that with the gassing it shot his immune system to hell, and that could cause the major infection. He is now restricted to bed until Wednesday (except for doctor visits).

My son is angry. He is impatient. He is only 23. His life the last few days has been turned upside down. Sweats so bad he has had to change the sheets on his bed a few times a day, a horrid headache that doesnt stop and he said he is just so tired.

He called me tonight after he had gotten up from a four hour nap. He is finally starting to sound like my boy again. I even got him to laugh. (We were both watching America's Funniest Video's.)

I have emailed a couple of Government agencies already and will do more tomorrow. I have found where websites about Zug Isand seem to have been removed from the web. Hmmmm...

Sorry US Steel and Ford. I will spread the word. Too many people work there and risk their lives each day. How many families have had their worlds turned inside out due to the illnesses the workers have developed later on in life due to the toxic fumes at that plant?

I am not saying the Union isn't at fault here either. The Union and the companies need to communicate and work together. They have human beings working for them that they need to take care of and give them a safe and secure workplace.

My son is lucky. And so am I. He is alive. That might not have been the case had the man working with him not noticed the sudden changes in his behavior.

Thank you sir. From the bottom of my heart - thank you.

Benzene...and my son

My son called me yesterday around 5pm....

"Mom, I got gassed today".

You got WHAT?

My son is an apprentice pipefitter. He is currently working in a hell hole in the Detroit area. No one wants to work there. Camera's are not allowed there.

OSHA SHOULD be there.

He tells me that his supervisor gives them new cartridges for their respirators every TWO weeks... Excuse me? Two freaking weeks? He is working in a highly toxic area.

OSHA requirements say they are allowed:
"concentrations of benzene exceed or can reasonably be expected to exceed, the permissible exposure limits, either the 8-hour time weighted average exposure of 1 ppm or the short-term exposure limit of 5 ppm for 15 minutes. "

My son was sick to his stomach, didn't quite know where he was, said he thought his head was going to explode.

They took him to a clinic...not a hospital (grrrrrrr). Luckily his boss went with him. He MADE the doctor take blood samples. He called last night and this morning to check on my boy.

This, taken from a Detroit News article in 2005: "The home to US Steel, Zug Island is so full of toxins that, 40 years ago, it was considered the most polluted square mile on Earth."

You can go to the EPA's website, put in Zug Island and get pages and pages of penalties, etc.

And my son works there.

My son could have died there.

US Steel and Ford? I am doing my research. You will hear from me.

US Government? You too will hear from me.

Vacation!!!! (yes again!)

A week from tomorrow I will be on a plane to Florida...Sunny Isles Beach to be exact! :) <--see the smile there, its a big one.

We found that instead of going to Phoenix we can probably get three trips out of the price of the airline tickets.

The view in the picture above was taken from the balcony of the hotel where we stayed before - and will be staying again.

I can't wait!!!

Ocean, sand, surf....life guards :)

Nine days of sun (please please...ohhhh please let there be sun!) and warmth. (Anything will be warmer than Ohio!)

I have five more days in the office (yes, dummy me is working next Monday - or part of it....maybe). I just know the time will pass slowly.

But it will be worth it...I just know it :)

Written Elevator Rage....

Yes elevator!

ARGHHHH!

People can be so rude! Did no one have parents teach them any manners?? Does anyone know what manners are anymore??

Our offices moved recently - from a 24 floor building to a 4 floor building. Its wonderful. At the old place we had to stand and wait forever for an elevator and when you finally got one so many people would get on that they would step on your feet - shove you to the back etc...

I thought those days were over....until today.

Now we park in a large parking garage...12 floors. Tonight I took the elevator instead of the stairs...and I was shoved to the back.

Ok, so I pushed myself against the back glass so as not to have my feet stood on...but I was the first to get out.

Door opens..."Excuse me"....(no movement)

"Excuse me" (again, no movement)

"I'd really appreciate being able to get off this damned elevator."

Two women parted...sort of like the red sea, only not as far.

What happened to stepping OUT of an elevator (you can put your hand on the door so it doesnt shut)?? If someone behind me wants off, I step OUT of the elevator and give them room to escape.

I swear...next time I will stand there and start talking to myself. I will mumble things about head lice or body crabs...I will draw a circle on the floor and tell them to stay out of my space....I will tell them, not so politely, to move their ass!

Arrrgh!

Kids! Just when you think you have them figured out...

They do and say things so mature that you just totally freak...

Totally.

Ok, so you know I have this 23 yr old son. He's not perfect (thankgod). How could he be? He was raised by me! Yep, he lived with me alone from the time he was 15 months old till he was going on 20...and then he moved to that northern state...the one with wolverines.

Anyway...he called the other night all excited. His friend had called him about a house that is sitting empty - the previous owners lost it to foreclosure. He talked so quickly about it having 5 bedrooms, 2-1/2 baths on a 1/2 acre lot - WITH LAKE ACCESS!!! The house is currently available for about 1/2 or so of what it could sell for (houses in the area are going for over $300,000). He could have a couple roomies to help with the mortgage...and it has LAKE ACCESS! He would have a yard of his own, a huge kitchen...and LAKE ACCESS!

In case you don't understand...my son sorta kinda loves to fish.

So, here is my not perfect son....growing up, thinking of buying a home!

He called tonight about it again. He spoke with his Dad and they are going over Thursday to look at it closely.

I have teased him that now he even has room for me :)

He agreed! :)

But, I wouldn't do that. It's time for my boy to have his life. And he is well on his way...he really is.

Full Figured????

Ok, I hardly ever watch those nighttime entertainment shows - but tonight was different. I saw a commercial about a young girl modeling for a national magazine. And (insert valley girl voice here) ohmygod! she was a size 10 and they called her FULL FIGURED! ohforgodssake!!!

What the hell is wrong with this world anymore?? People blame the magazines and movies for girls wanting to become pencil thin..what the hell? This was a "news magazine" show! They called this beautiful young girl who has a SHAPE full figured! Since when did having curves become taboo?

Now I know you are probably thinking I am some short round 51 yr old woman..yadayada... Wrong. I used to be a very large woman. I was a very large young woman. In high school I weighed 230 lbs. I lost 100 lbs my senior year and kept it off. Yes, I gained a lot of weight when I was preggers for my boy...but I took that off too. I wear a size 4/6.

But that doesn't matter...I just get so pissed off at people who put such pressure on these young women to look like lollipops! Straight, no shape and these big heads on their shoulders. There is a commercial for some weight loss program that has a woman stating she used to be a size 10 and now is a size 2! She makes it sound like she weighed 50,000 lbs before! She was a freaking size 10! People treat a size 10 like they used to treat a size 20 or 24! (I wore a size 20, I know!)

ARGHHHHH!

The young woman in that magazine was gorgeous! She has a shape, she is absolutely beautiful! She is NOT a big girl! She is NOT full figured!

She HAS a figure!

Ok, I'll get off my soapbox now. I have a bowl of pretzels calling my name. :)

OHIO STATE BUCKEYES!!

Enough said :)